On New Year’s Day, my wife and I were going to go out and do some shopping. We just needed to get out of the house, and it was too cold to do anything truly ‘outside.’ So we ended up at Barnes and Noble, and while we had each got our share of calendars as Christmas gifts, my wife suggested I get some kind of daily calendar. You know these calendars that you remove a sheet each day, and there is some fun joke, or fact, or word each day. The reason she suggested it, was because I used to love these calendars.
On a few occasions, I’ve purchased for myself daily calendars mostly containing the ‘italian word or phrase of the day’ in an attempt to learn Italian. It’s a fun way of passing the time, and I put it on my desk at work, and I always enjoy them, for the first few months at least.
When she suggested that I buy one, my response to her was “I’ve never finished a whole calendar” because I end up leaving a job and it goes in a box for ‘later’. When I got laid off in 2016, there was just a month and a half left in the year, and we found the calendar months later. Before that, I left a job I hated and the calendar got lost in the process.
So, in one of my rare fits of superstition, I decided not to buy a daily calendar, for fear that I would not end the year at my job. Don’t get me wrong, there are a ton of options in which that is a great thing, and I won’t fight it if something amazing comes along, but I guess it was mostly out of a fear of losing this job. I enjoy where I am work-wise, and while it isn’t perfect, it’s pretty damn good, one of the best atmosphere’s that I’ve been in a long time, and I don’t want to lose that.
Also, I don’t want the job to become something I hate and then lose. That happened at my last job, it was a great job, with a great atmosphere, and then the last 6 months were terrifying, and ultimately ended in me getting laid off. I don’t think it makes it better when the job deteriorates first.
I just realized— just now, while I’m writing this— that I’m starting 2018 from a place of fear. Which totally isn’t what I feel like overall, I’m very excited about where I’m at, and where I think I’m going, but ultimately I just don’t want to make any plans for work that consume the next 365 days.
Happy New Years everyone! Don’t worry like me!